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Here’s your exclusive invitation to the new and improved Lass O’Gowrie 2019

Here’s your exclusive invitation to 2019. More specifically, here is your exclusive invitation to the new and improved Lass O’Gowrie 2019. As you may have heard, the much loved local establishment has recently been sold, and although saved from the sweaty palms of investors, the alternative (in our humble opinion) is perhaps worse.

Live music will obviously still be a thing, as long as by live music you mean a musician stuffed in a corner, wearing a bowtie he recycled from that wedding he went to one time and working for peanuts (or nothing at all). Still counts right?

Sure, the Lass has been a home and a stage to many wonderful local and touring acts over the years but that’s all (thankfully) in the past. We have to think of the neighbours (baby boomers) after all, those complaints won’t make themselves and soundproofing is just a preposterous suggestion, obviously. Hearing any sort of hullabaloo in the middle of the city is just a ridiculous suggestion, peace and quiet forever, nightlife never.

The young people have so many places to go. So many safe places where they can truly be themselves. Kick back, have a beer in a nice, relaxed beer garden. Beautiful, tranquil establishments like the Argyle and The Newy. Newcastle’s finest and a reflection of just how truly dope we all are. Yeaahhh NEWYYY.

The Lass though, a place that some of the youngins have been going to for probably close to a decade or more but hey…They’ve have had their time. It’s the boomers turn now. No shirt no shoes no service. This is a classy joint kids, so pay up or get out. Unless of course you’re willing to fork out for the ‘funky’ accommodation either upstairs or downstairs. It doesn’t matter it’s all the same to them.

But hey, we’ll all grow old with the Lass. By all I mean, those of us who are old will most likely grow even older, sipping on overpriced cocktails, counting their pennies and bitching about avocado and young.

The Lass is dead. Sorry kids. Rip forever. Welcome to Newy 2019.

Written by Laura Kebby

I write words about talented people doing talented things, and translate chatter by putting pen to paper.

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