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Clickbait Survival Guide

Clickbait catches you when you least suspect it and it will find you at your most vulnerable

The internet is a wonderful place, but it is also a dangerous and treacherous place. There are corners of the internet that would make an elephant graveyard seem like a flipping theme park. I heard that Trump lives there, in the ‘internets’, and the version we see in real life is one of those lizard men the conspiracy peeps keep banging on about (but that’s another story for another time).  But the most dangerous thing you could and would come across as you surf the digital wave is clickbait.

Clickbait or el-clickety comes in many shapes and forms. Clickbait also has many target audiences and the trickiest of tricksters will lure you in by pitting us against each other. For example. Baby Boomer rolls yells at cloud (again). Millennial wastes time, money and air by existing. Top five things women wish men would do (but never will). What does your cd collection say about you? Fort Scratchley is for sale etc.

Clickbait catches you when you least suspect it and it will find you at your most vulnerable. First thing in the morning for example, as you stretch your arms out wide, ignore your spouse, yawn (because clickbait never sleeps) reach for your favourite device and bam. There it is. Clickbait, clickbait everywhere. You try your hardest not to, well you know, click, but the draw is just too strong. The pull of some loosely put together, vaguely mysterious yet somehow significant string of sentences is just too tempting to turn away from. You click. And click. And click. And suddenly you’re late for work and knee deep in a Facebook argument over Fiona the Hippo and wondering where it all went wrong.

So what can you do? What can you do to resist the clickbait pull and fight against the tide? Well look, honestly I have no idea what you can do to stop such a thing. The internet will probably outsmart us all one day and it will be like Handmaids tale meets Bladerunner or something. It’s scary to think of the actual capabilities of the internet and where it will take us in the future. But mostly, I think it’s about taking life (and clickbait) all in our stride and remembering what is real and what matters. Life is one big L O L after all right?

Ps the headline is so totally clickbait sorry not sorry.

Written by Laura Kebby

I write words about talented people doing talented things, and translate chatter by putting pen to paper.

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